The Big Guy Finds Fifty in Fine Style

(Coldspring, TX) – The Lifelong Best Friend has surrendered to the inevitable and reached his 50th birthday. Since he has been by my side for every major milestone in my life, including the first day of first grade, I couldn’t possibly pass up the chance to commemorate this occasion.


The sun certainly has set on our youth; but when you’ve known one another as long as we have, a moment like this is appropriate for telling stories about one another. In a stunning development, he actually told one my wife had not heard. That made her weekend, I think, even if the story wasn’t particularly flattering and I don’t recall it exactly as he tells it.



He’s not the tallest man you will ever meet, and he has developed a thick skin about his diminutive stature. His size has never mattered to me. I’ve always looked up to him. He’s been a loyal friend for so long that I actually do not remember a time when I did not know him. His younger brother and I have a collectively vague recollection about the first time we all met. Our mothers were friends, and so chances are we really have been together since infancy.

He’s lived more than half his fifty years in Texas. His wife is a Texan and his children all were born in the Lone Star State, so I guess he’s been fully assimilated into the state’s citizenry.

Maybe that’s a good thing. It proves once and for all that not everything is bigger in Texas.


I brought him a package of Louisiana-themed gifts and urged him to remember his roots. I even iced down several Louisiana-brewed beers in various flavors.
I looked up at one point, though, and saw him drinking sangria. I guess he’s lost to us for good.
He’s a brilliant guy who by all accounts is successful and happy. As his friend, that’s the best I can hope for.
Happy birthday, old man.

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Leftovers From the Party

I hoped, as the big Five-Oh party percolated in people’s brains for a while, that stories would emerge. I have not been disappointed.
The early favorite comes from a couple with whom we’ve been friends for many years. I did not know that a few weeks ago, he fell in the shower and bit his tongue. He has been recovering from a deep, painful laceration. His wife told me, “We were having a great time but we had to leave earlier than we otherwise would have. He was talking so much, his tongue was throbbing.”

Another back story comes from those now-legendary “My Face is my Present” tee shirts. One of the wives phoned in the order for the shirts well in advance. When she did it, she had a Crest Whitestrip on her teeth, apparently creating a temporary lisp. So, when they went to pick up the shirts, they said “My Faith is my present.” A nice sentiment, no doubt; but it was hardly in keeping with the theme of the evening. Fortunately for the sake of the joke, they were able to turn around "face" shirts quickly.
There were plenty of cameras at the party and photos are emerging at a rapid clip. In fact, there is now indisputable evidence that my sweet, apparently camera shy, mother-in law was there with a friend in tow.
And, if you want verification of how I suffered during the gentle roasting by some of my buddies, you need see nothing more than this:
The reviews have been glowing as people regale us with tales of wonderful “worlds collide” moments.
One attendee ran into the ex-husband of a friend. She knew who he was but he did not know her. When he introduced himself, she was reluctant to give her last name. Apparently, she had been complicit in some divorce-related shenanigans several years ago. Fortunately, the statute of limitations had long since passed, as had the man’s anger. Ultimately, they were able to get a good laugh out of it.

People are raving about the band we hired.
And they can't stop talking about the cupcakes. There were several varieties including lemon and red velvet; but the ones that have people smacking their lips had chocolate icing, white chocolate chips and cookie dough in the middle.
Arguably the highest compliment my wife was paid came in the form of a question: “who catered these cupcakes? They’re fantastic.” Every one of them was homemade by the cupcake committee.
They were decorative as well as delicious and the staff at the venue did a great job of keeping the towers stacked with fresh cupcakes. Here's the pre-party set-up:
My wife spent months planning this event. She had a decorating team, a couple of guys to do the heavy lifting and lots of other folks pitching in.
It’s a great tribute to her that she was able to bring so many people together to pull it off and that it was, by all accounts, a rousing success.
The weekend I turned 50 will be a cherished memory thanks to hundreds of friends who were a part of it.
There’s no way I can thank everyone enough.
Now, there’s pressure. See, my wife is just a year and a half younger than me. How can I top all this?

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Finally Fifty

So, today I turned 50. I didn’t realize that people brought stuff to the party a few nights ago. My family conspired to keep all the cards and gifts from me until my actual birthday. So, this evening I was swamped with gifts.
Given the sheer volume of wine I received, people must think that I need help easing into my new demographic category; or, as my daughter put it, “that’s just the civilized adult gift.”
I also received several books, as well as lots of gift cards to download books to my Kindle. I guess my affection for my e-reader is widely known. Given the amount of reading material now available to me, I suppose my friends believe I am about to lapse into a sedentary lifestyle. This thing is, that may actually happen.
The gifts indicate that people know me well, because there was also a generous array of restaurant gift cards. I’ll be eating, drinking and reading well into winter. They are the gifts that keep on giving.
In the wake of the lively festivities which ushered in my birthday weekend, we were ready to scale things down a bit; so, just the wife and the kids went with me to one of our fanciest restaurants for a special birthday dinner.
People showed up, brought cards and gifts and gave generously of their time. It’s been a fabulous birthday event. It’s great to have friends. Thanks, everybody.

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A Party for the Aged

Somebody decided it would be a good idea to throw a party to draw attention to the fact that I’m turning 50. Getting to half-a-hundred is no accomplishment; it just means I’m still breathing. We decided to ask people to come together so I could thank those who have helped me along the way. The invitations were mailed and/ or e-mailed and people showed up.
The theme was “worlds collide.” Family, friends, co-workers from media and healthcare, folks from the church and a couple of crashers all mingled essentially without incident. There was intrigue, hazing, hilarity and a good dose of dancing. There were no fights and nobody got arrested, so I guess we can say the evening was a success.
Did I say “hazing?” A long time ago, when I was a TV sportscaster, I was on my way to cover a ball game when someone asked me if I had the proper credential. Joking, I said “My face is my pass.” As you can imagine, this phrase has been permanently attached to me. My friends will not let it die. In fact, several of them showed up at the party in tee shirts that said “My face is my present.”
Since worlds were colliding, at least half the people in the room didn’t get the joke. So, naturally somebody had to grab a microphone and tell (er, wildly embellish) the story. This led to a series of alarmingly exaggerated tales of my misdeeds. Finally, I just had to say, “Hey, a lot of these people don’t know about my former scorched-earth philosophies.”

There were some great reunions. The four-person KTBS sports staff from the early 1980’s was together for the first time in a quarter-century.

Embedded in the tee shirt group are five guys who in various combinations worked together in the KTAL sports department in the 1990’s and some who worked together at KSLA and some who worked together at KTBS. (There was a lot of moving around in local TV).Almost everybody was there.
At one point, we tried to assemble an all-inclusive group of people who had worked with me in local TV. There were sportscasters, anchors, producers, a PM Magazine host, a feature reporter and more.
Two former general managers showed up. (One who had replaced the other. Worlds collide!)Somehow, they missed the photo, as did one of our oldest friends, who was a local anchor for a couple of decades. She hung out, though.
There were radio people: a very popular local morning show host and a veteran newswoman were among those who were there to celebrate.
There was even a network television sports anchor there to spice things up.
My dentist was there! (He was my freind before he was my dentist).
So was my insurance agent and his spectacular wife, who have been great friends to us for 25 years.
Many of my young friends arrived early. Some of them stayed late.The neighborhood was represented, too. The fine folks from across the street were all smiles.
My father showed up, stayed late and held court with many visitors.
Somehow,my sweet mother-in-law avoided the camera. But, she was there looking lovely.
My son was fascinated with the band, particularly the fetching lead singer; and who can blame him?
I got to dance with my girls, although I can’t say for sure whether my wife or I had a more difficult time letting go and relaxing. We were, after all, hosting a party and there’s pressure involved in all that.
My daughter, who arrived only hours earlier from a mission trip to Mexico, kept things lively and partied all night and into the morning. Consider it college prep, I guess.
Talk about party pressure: There were several people in attendance who have the ability to fire me in the blink of an eye, including my company’s CEO.
The bosses and their spouses were fully engaged, several of them even dancing with the birthday boy.
Yes, I danced. If you can’t dance at 50, when can you dance?

The lifelong best friend, one of his brothers and one of his sisters were there with spouses in tow. He has more stories to tell than anybody, but God bless him; he never grabbed a microphone.
With the party successfully behind us, I’m sitting back waiting for stories to emerge.
The worlds collided without cataclism and now I can once again concentrate on the center of my universe:
Happy birthday to me.

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